Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Twuth an' Justice

Monday I had jury duty. Massachusetts has a one day/one trial rule - serving exempts you from jury duty for the next three years. Alas, they moved the courthouse from the tremendously convenient building in EC (East Cambridge) to Woburn. So, I trundled out to Woburn (directions provided by Her Royal Highness TomTomasina, thank goodness, because I would never have found it on my own) and lined up at an obscenely early hour with the rest of the unwashed shivering in the cool, gloomy weather.

Finally it was my turn to go through security, where they impounded my blogger's friend, the digital camera, so I could line up again to receive a little randomly assigned juror number card. Once all 200 or so of us had been seated, we were treated to a little video presentation on jury duty. Although it was well done and somewhat interesting, the narrator of the first part (a Supreme Court Judge) was either not a native English speaker or was struggling mightly to control a severe lisp (in which case I apologize for my snarky sense of humor!) It ended up sounding like something from the Princess Bride. "Twuth an' Justice...."

The Impressive Clergyman: Mawage. Mawage is wot bwings us togeder tooday. Mawage, that bwessed awangment, that dweam wifin a dweam...
[cut to Westley, Inigo, and Fezzik]
The Impressive Clergyman: And wuv, tru wuv, will fowow you foweva...
[cut to the trio again]
The Impressive Clergyman: So tweasure your wuv.
Prince Humperdinck: Skip to the end.
The Impressive Clergyman: Have you the wing?
[cut to the trio once more]
The Impressive Clergyman: ...and do you,Pwincess Buwwercup...
Prince Humperdinck: Man and wife. Say man and wife.
The Impressive Clergyman: Man an' wife.

Anyway, my "service" (which I spent sitting in a corner reading and jotting down ideas for a SAS paper) was terminated early when the trial I was destined for had a SDP (sexually dangerous predator) opt for a decision by the judge rather than a jury. Safe for another 3 years!

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